THIS is the year!

It has been a consistent uphill battle for me, personally, these past couple months to find words - even coherent thoughts - to just express anything. Like, ANY THING AT ALL. Adoption-related, especially.

We spent so many months filling out forms, earning our education credits, and fundraising like it was our job! Ha! You all really came through on that one for us - more on that later.

So, yah. The blog kinda fell by the wayside. To our friends and family who have been so incredibly loving and supportive of our adoption efforts, I apologize. I never meant to leave anyone in the dark on our progress. And we HAVE been making progress! If you don't count the stinking WAITING we are still doing, we're actually at a very exciting part in the process - and that exciting part is that the WAIT is almost over! The appointments and Zooms and tests and interviews and MILES OF PAPERWORK are out of our hands! Hence the waiting...

I hate to be all echo-y and cliché, but I also can't ignore the fact that getting through 2020 was no small feat. I can only speak from my own experience, but I felt like it was one frustrating disappointment after another. No need to rehash it all, but man, guys...I was supposed to see Elton John live this past spring (saaad songs...sad songs say so much!). And take my kids to Disney World for the first time! Paul was supposed to run in the Boston Marathon and our family had lots of plans to travel this summer. Of course, those disappointments pale in comparison to people who lost loved ones, jobs, and homes due to the pandemic. I want to end this paragraph by just saying how grateful I am for all that we DO have. We have a lot.

Virtual school has been tough. Although I love being a virtual teacher, I do not enjoy this side of things as a parent! My kids have struggled with this as well. Being with each other, all day, every day is HARD. There, I said it. We love each other - we've had a lot of fun being together and making special memories. But we've missed school, traveling, and seeing other people!

I read a quote somewhere that went along the lines of, "All we need to be happy is someone to love and something to look forward to." That was the gist, anyway. While I think happiness or satisfaction might be more complex than that, a lot of it can be boiled down to those categories. Loving and being loved probably being a majority...although having something to look forward to does immeasurable good for our mental state - as I think we all found out this year! Not knowing when things will "go back to normal" has ripped the proverbial rug from under our feet. I didn't realize how much I depend on that rug for my comfort and security. I want to PLAN STUFF. I want to CONTROL STUFF. I want to LOOK FORWARD WITH ANTICIPATION TO ALL THE STUFF.

Even without a defined timeline, we look forward. Even when the next step is out of our hands, we hope. When we feel like Phil Connors on stinking Groundhog's Day, we are faithful! And, hey, we have to laugh in the meantime too. That's very important. Let me update the actual adoption progress! Bullet points:

* We FINISHED everything for our home study. Our FINAL Zoom with our social worker was on Dec. 22nd and now all of our paperwork is in her hands!

* Our placement agency (different from our home study agency) accepted all our submitted work to them and we signed FOUR contracts with them in Dec, too. There was a brief (and scary) hiccup when they weren't sure Korea would accept our psych evals (You know, the ones that took us months to schedule and 3 separate appointments to complete? And also cost $600?)...but the agency decided to accept them and now we are praying that whatever judge receives them in Korea will accept them as well!

* In October, we did another bake sale at the Rockford Farmer's Market with Team Orphans - this was a nice little fundraiser for us! An even bigger fundraiser and MUCH MORE impressive feat was accomplished by Paul in his 100 MILE RUN! I seriously still cannot believe he did this. Lots of friends pledged sponsorship by the mile or gave donations as a lump sum. It was such an incredible event and we were blown away by the folks who came out in person to support Paul throughout that grueling 22 hours. I hope Paul will share more about his experience on this blog soon!

* In November-December, Clara Cookies, a local non-profit, designated all cookie sales for our adoption!

* Also in November, my dear Marah Grant used her insanely successful photography business to run a fundraiser for us! She singlehandedly raised $1000 for us in one day AND took amazing family portraits for us too. Talk about a win-win! Thank you, Aunt Mertie, Champion of champs!

* All that fundraising updating to say....we surpassed $40k. That. Is. INCREDIBLE! We have been able to pay both of our agencies for their services upfront and without anxiety. THANK YOU!!

* Now we await the finalization of the home study (should be ANY day!) so that we can submit our immigration application with Homeland Security. I've already started the app and gathered the required docs to include. This also means that our agency will match us with a child, which is the point I have been DYYYYYYING to get to! Boy? Girl? Infant? Toddler? Preschooler? AHHHHH!

* Reaching this step also means making travel plans. The idea of this puts me all in my feels. I'm beside myself to meet our son or daughter; I'm thrilled for Paul to go back to Korea for the first time; I'm anxious about leaving my tireless trio back at home; I'm nervous about travel restrictions and the potential of quarantining in a foreign country.

[above]: Our 300 piece puzzle is not even full, but it contains the names of so many awesome people who have contributed to bringing home baby Paschal in one way or another! Over $40,000 raised! If you donated, sponsored, shopped...your name is on here! Actually, I think I have a couple more names to add. Lol

I want to end this by inviting you to celebrate with us that THIS IS THE YEAR! We thought we would be adopting once upon a time in 2018, after becoming foster licensed in '17. But that wasn't our year. As disappointing as that was, we learned so much and are thankful to be here in 2021. Paschal #6 will be home this year! How's that for "someone to love and something to look forward to"?!

Thanks again for being on this trip with us :) We love you and are excited to share some actual NEWS soon!

- B